Most of the time I write about my running. I'd like to share an experience about
I'm a father of a beautiful little 6 year old, that if my heart had it's way I would wrap in bubble wrap and make sure nothing ever happened to her. I know in my brain that she needs to get hurt, she needs to scrape knees. She's going to get her heartbroken. She will have a friend betray her at some point. We all do it's life. It sucks, but the parts that suck make the parts that are worth living, that much more beautiful and worth it. It's hard to remember that sometimes as parent. It's hard toremember that when you see anyone do something that you know exactly how it's going to turn out.
This weekend I spent 3 hours walking 4 miles with her in the trails. Each hill we saw she wanted to run up. If it looked to be unrunnable, she ran faster. She did the same with the down hills. I saw her little feet bouncing off roots and rocks. I was worried the entire time she was going to get hurt. Sometimes I even asked her to slow down, (having faceplanted a few times on those very roots and rocks). One point she looked at a hill that didn't even have a real good trail on it and asked if we could go down it. It was steep and she was sure to fall. I found myself trying to hold her hand and hold on to a shrub and make sure she didn't fall. I didn't really have a chance. She took off, went full steam down the hill and assured me "it's ok Daddy, I'm ok" Now it didn't really settle in with me until today when I was reading a post on the ultra list. It was just about not coddling people all the time. Yeah I took it way out of context and had this whole inner revelation about my kid and my life. It was just a big thought for me. Later that night, I watched her crawl into bed, gave her a kiss and my normal good night of "Dream well" and she looked at me and told me how much fun she had. She was out in minutes.
Most of this comes back to life in general, running, hiking, parenting, etc. You can't protect everyone from getting hurt all the time. Just because something shitty happens doesn't mean that it was a bad thing. Look at it this way. Say she gets picked on in school by a mean kid. A few things can happen, .
1- she can learn to stand up for herself to that kid, the outcome is positive so she enforces that action in her head, and nurtures that skill into who she is later in life and becomes a powerful woman who stands up for herself and becomes an influential person in many lives.
2- she backs down, gets upset goes home and figures a way to release her stres, dance, music, writing, building something, thinking, studying, something.. anything. Then that skill is brought into light and because it's become a passion and she uses it, and it becomes her life.
3- she backs down, she hurts from it, and she says she will NOT let that happen again. Next time she figures it out.
I'm sure there are TONS more ways this can pan out... All I mean is that if someone goes through a little pain in life, they can learn a lot. Both about themselves and about their life.
So I guess what I figured out is if, I make her too cautious, because I'm scared of what she's about to face, she may never climb it. If she never climbs it, she'll never reach the top. If she never reaches the top, she'll never see the view. And who am I to take that view away from her.